New South Wales have a bit of a snooty opinion of Queenslanders. They call us banana benders, think that Sydney is better than Brisbane and insist that their rum was once so good that it caused a government takeover.

Well, things have bloody changed since then. What once may have been a mighty state of all things awesome, like rum, is now a cold, derelict shell of a place. NSW pride is more strongly associated with riots in Cronulla than winning things worth winning.

Like competitions of football. Or rum.

And so we review the 2 best rums we can find in each state!

The Winner – Queensland

Bundaberg Master Distillers Blenders Edition 2015

This rum is pretty hard to beat. In fact, it just won the best rum in the world at the World Drinks Awards.

So New South Wales didn’t really stand a chance. Like, ever.

Bundaberg Rum has a definite cult status in Australia. I’ve stood at the rum shelves many a time lamenting a Diplomatico vs a Zacapa 23, and in the 10 minutes I spend making a decision, at least 20 bogans have pushed me out of the way to buy a standard bottle of Bundy Rum.

I have absolutely no affinity to that stuff. It’s a poor example of a rum, and definitely a poor example of Aussie rum.

So until the Master Distillers was an award-winner, I never took it seriously. But this rum is now well and truly on my radar!

The Epic Bottle

It has an epic bottle. It’s thick, heavy and almost worthy of being a decanter. Strong, clean lines and sleek brand implimentation.

Feels food in the hand. You could use this bottle as a weapon. But don’t.

Deep Rich Nose

The nose offers so much here. It’s a gorgeous fragrance, I reckon you could wear it as a perfume. It’s a very heady experience, and I sniffed my glass for a good 5 minutes before taking my 1st sip.

• Deep, rich caramel sauce
• Tropical bananas
• Christmas spices; vanilla, cinnamon, star anise, cloves and nutmeg
• Dried fruits of apricot, raisins and currents
• Sweet fortified wine

Long, Lingering Palate

This rum goes on and on and on. Long after you’ve taken your last sip, you’ll still feel it dancing on your palate. There’s easy evidence of the port and sherry finishing barrels. And the smoothness! So dangerous.

• Caramel lollies
• Tracle sandwiches
• Dried Christmas fruits
• Baking spices
• A lick of smoke
• Smooth, easy-drinking and lusciously long finish

I’ll definitely be looking out for the 2016 edition of this fine drop!

The Loser – New South Wales

Dead Man’s Drop

I feel like this spiced rum was made for cold winter nights in NSW with the fire roaring and a bit of romance on the rug. It’s the kind of rum to get you in the mood for some loving, and by that suggestion I need to be straight up clear and say this rum is definitely a bit girly.

It’s sweet, super flavoursome and light hearted. It’s definitely something I’d drink with my girlfriends.

The Dark Scary Bottle

You know this rum is serious about its name. The liquid is black as night, and definitely one of the darkest rums we’ve ever reviewed.

Spicy Nose

• Sweet treacle and vanilla
• Loads of fruit cakey smells
• Strong anise and cinnamon
• Lingering citrus of mandarin and lemon

Warms your Cockles

Even though this rum is a 40% ABV beast, it stil drinks much like a liqueur. Something I tend to think of when drinking every spiced rum. This would be an approachable drop for someone new to sipping rum.

• Very sweet brandy snap biscuits
• Strong sweet citrus; mandarin, orange, tangerine and satsuma
• Christmas spices
• Finishes short-mid, with a distinctive liquorice conclusion

Don’t be sad NSW.

 You might win the football.

They all have a snazzy square bottle that looks top class with minimalist labelling and perfect for gifting. The prices are a bit more than you’d expect to pay for Bundy, but our opinion is they’re worth the price.

This offering is the cheapest of the collection at about $55.

They’re aged in cognac and brandy barrels, and as the name suggests there’s only a few made in a run.

Confusing Nose

Our wenches had a lot of trouble identifying the nose as there’s a very strong initial wash of acetone that assaults the smell. Once the nail polish remover had passed, it became much more pleasing and actually enjoyable.

• Oaky barrel
• Sweet molasses  agave nectar
• Liquorice
• Banana
• Fruity berries; mulberry pie & macerated strawberries

Tart, Tight Palate

We all agreed that this was the 1st Bundy rum we’d tried that we thought was a pleasant sippable rum, despite it having an initial bitterness. All others previous are reserved for cocktails and mixing only.

• Green grapes
• Gooseberries
• Vinegared capers
• Maple syrup
• Rubber glove

Overall, we think this is worth a try and we’re willing to give the rest of the Master Distillers’ Rum Collection from Bundaberg Rum a go as well.

Ord River Rum is the best Australian

It’s got a pretty impressive story too. It’s from Hoochery Distillery, way out west in the Kimberley near Kununurra, Western Australia. We’ve heard the distillery is quite an impressive place to visit. It’s built from local timber and has a distinctive country feel about the place. Which is quite fitting for a rum distillery.

Not only that, but the owner is a bit of a character. Even without meeting him we can tell that Raymond (Spike) Dessert III with his big hat has a strong passion for good booze. So much so that when his local source of molasses disappeared because the sugar mill closed in Kununurra, he went and bought himself a sugar cane farm, a cane crusher, and squeezed his own cane juice to make his rum. Since the place pretty much stays above 30C all year, that’s dedication to his craft in the hot Aussie sun.

Ord River Rum Nosings

The nose on this rum was magnificent! We got:

• Intense barrell smell, very oaky
• Leatherwood honey
• Mejool dates
• Coconut suntan lotion
• Caramely treacle

Tastes Like a Tropical Party!

Since we’re in the tropics already, this rum is perfect for an outdoors celebration.

• Banana
• Toasted coconut
• Caramel cheesecake
• Banoffee pie; banana, caramel, cream and yummy
• Christmas spices; vanilla and cinnamon

This is one of the few sipper rums made in Australia. We recommend you try some neat. It’s got some burn like a good whisky, spirited and hard. Like an Aussie.

So for Australia Day in 2016, we’re celebrating with the best Aussie rum we’ve found. Ord River Premium Rum. You can buy some on Spike’s website, or head over the The Paddock for a tasting, like we did. Tastes good with steak. And sausages. Pop one in your Aussie esky and party big.

Plantation Rum bottle spirit from all over the Carribean including cognac, calvados, gin and vodka, but in the wretched minds of wenches, they’ll always be a legendary rum producer. They’re frequent award winners at rum competitions and have a broad spectrum of interesting rums to try. In fact, we often see their rums packaged in cute little sample boxes across different island distilleries, or different years.

They have a signature double aging process, where the rums are initially aged in their Carribean homes where the weather is typical of the tropics; hot, humid and perfect for eating mangoes. When they’re ready, they’re shipped off to a French chateau in the Cognac region where they’re matured in smaller casks in classic wine cellar conditions. It’s very posh, and that attention to excellence flows through into the glass.

The bottle is gorgeous!

It’s a thick, heavy bottle with a big cork. It produces a satisfying ‘pop’ when you open it.

The bottle is also artistically wrapped in a rope-looking dried grass which adds to its rustic appeal. It’s tied on tight, and doesn’t interfere with the cork or pouring the rum, so you can leave it on display on the bottle until its empty.

The rum is a rich and dark amber colour. Well beyond golden, it looks like honey peeking through the glass.

Tastes like Christmas

Everything about this rum makes it the perfect Christmas present. It actually tastes like a Christmas pudding in a bottle! It’s elegant, refined and delicious, the age certainly makes a big difference to the smoothness as it’s a very plesant drop neat or on ice. Here’s what we tasted:

• Heavy wooded oak
• Toasted coconut
• Salted caramel sauce
• Christmas pudding spices;
  • Allspice
  • Nutmeg
  • Cloves
  • Cinnamon
• Vanilla milkshake
• Christmas pudding fruit;
  • Dried citrus peel
  • Sultanas
  • Currants
  • Mejool dates
• Freshly squeezed oranges

Clearly there’s a lot going on in this rum, and you’ll probably find yourself nosing it luxuriously for quite some time before taking a sip.

Be a legend, buy it for a mate

This rum is really hard to find in Australia, but we bought ours from Nick’s. They even have free delivery as the bottle is over $100.

Merry Christmas, Love the Rum Wenches.

Agave is a famous plant because of its involvement in the tequila making process. Blue agave is particularly high in sugar, and while we’re not sure that this rum has blue agave in it, their website lists agave as a flavour additive only; so we wenches are thinking that it’s probably some agave nectar added.

Mmmmmm! Our customer favorite at the tasting bar! We take our award winning dark rum and add hints of delicate specialty flavors including Agave, and we arrive at a delicious one of a kind after dinner sipping rum. Whether you drink our Agave Rum on ice or at room temperature, this hand crafted smooth-as-silk flavor is sure to tantalize your taste buds. You can mix this rum too, but be warned, after one sip you will probably not want to mix it with anything.

Not Hard Enough

Us Aussies are a bit tougher than our Yankee friends, at least when it comes to rum consumption. This Agave Rum is just 35% alcohol, so it wouldn’t even be called a spirit by our standards. Not sure what it would be called. But it ain’t rum.

Let’s go with rum-like alcoholic beverage.

Having a Nosing

Straight from the bottle we’ve got acetone, banana, toffee and salted caramel. So this agave rum is showing some great characters from the smell.

The prominent aroma is like walking through the farmers market in summer. There’s a very strong heady overripe banana, not quite as strong as in the Goslings Black Seal, but it’s definitely there dancing in the wind. The other distinctly tropical fragrances are pineapple and passionfruit with a bit of mango smoothie.

Definitely the kind of rum that the you want to put in a glass and really soak up those smells before having a taste.

Overall, we’ve got;

• Banana
• Toffee
• Acetone
• Salted Caramel
• Tropical Fruit
• Pineapple
• Passionfruit
• Mango Smoothie

Ridiculously Smooth, Velvet Softness

Taking a long strong sip is the sort of thing you don’t do with rum. You just don’t know when it’s going to burn your vocal chords to oblivion. This rum is definitely not like that. The smoothness is definitely helped by the low alcohol content, reminiscent of Bacardi spiced rum in its playfulness.

This is the kind of rum you want to take to a party. She’s got a short skirt, fishnet stockings, black stilettos and this girl is definitely not going to disappoint on the dance floor. Guaranteed instant popularity.

Along with all that smoothness, we also taste:

• Apple pie with cream
• Salted caramel sauce
• Passionfuit explosion!
• Long, lingering butterscotch custard

Visit the Distillery

If you’re ever in Arizona, which is probably a really small place, you can visit their distillery! It’s the D3, the Desert Diamond Distillery.

This is because Substation No.41 is the name of the rum bar inside the Breakfast Creek Hotel. It’s not just any old rum bar – it’s probably the best rum bar in Australia, and certainly the best rum bar according to The Wenches. So you would expect that the guys over at the rum bar wouldn’t just let any old molasses juice get bottled with their label. They probably did some good QA on this stuff before it hit the shelves.

It’s a 2 year old rum, so just a spring chicken on the rum circuit, but even at 2 years it’s showing some impressive characters. We Wenches think it eclipses all other Aussie rums in terms of flavour, and will a bit of age behind it, may even be a worldwide legend. That QA looks to have paid off.

Interestingly, the rum bar itself has only been operating for 3 years, so we’re thinking they pretty much had this secret rum brew planned from the beginning. It was only launched in July 2015. Such clever pirates.

This is definitely a premium Aussie rum, but information on it is scarce. I couldn’t find anything about its distillation outside of what’s on the label; that it’s made from Queensland sugar, in Australia. Aged in oak barrels. You’d think they’d buried some bloody treasure at the distillery to keep such details secret.

Substation No. 41 Rum Tasting Notes

Smells like a school fete

All the things you love (hate) about a school fete are right here on the nose! There’s overripe banana, just like the one that little kid dropped, and you’ve stepped in it. There’s metho, for cleaning off the graffiti that the cool kids just spray painted over the dunny doors. And there’s soft molasses, a subtle sweet smell that wafts in the air near the fairy floss machine.

Finally, we’ve got honey from the baklava the Greek kid’s mum made. We love her stall the best.

• Overripe banana
• Methylated spirits
• Soft molasses
• Honey

Tastes like Thanksgiving

Have you ever actually had a Thanksgiving dinner in the USA? It’s a freaky feast unlike any other. The true excesses of the 1st world can be seen across the USA on Turkey Day.

The palate of this Substation No. 41 Rum is just like that, with a confusion of savoury and sweet. Excessive on the sweet end, but enough warmth and interest to keep you sipping through the night.

• Intense honey, much like baclava
• Bee pollen
• Light fennel aniseed
• Hard toffee
• Marshmallow fluff

Overall Thoughts

We like this rum, but we don’t love it. It’s definitely an Aussie standout, and still stand out because the flavour is good. With a bit more age in the barrel this rum will be a real stunner. Dan Murphy’s seem to be doing some tastings this week too, so if you want a free nip, head on down to your local Dan’s.

This is made in Australia’s oldest registered distillery, just 4 years older than Bundy, and is owned by Australian company Vok Beverages.

Their rum very proudly a Queensland product, with all ingredients being tightly controlled. Molasses is sought from Rocky Point Sugar Mill, which is Australia’s last remaining privately owned sugar mill just 15km from the distillery.

Beenleigh Rum seem to delight in using Queensland, family-owned sugar cane farm product, and they should be. So many companies try to lower their cost of production at the expense of food miles, and so this puts Beenleigh high on my ethics list.

Beenleigh’s Rum Bottle

All of Beenleigh’s products look similar, they look middle shelf, prestige and minimalistic.

We think they have a masculine blokey look about them, it doesn’t feel like a lady’s bottle. It also looks distinctively like other Aussie rum bottles, and feels right at home on an Aussie bloke’s bar.

Beenleigh 5 Year Old Dark Rum Tasting Notes

This rum divides the Wenches. We’ve polarised into 2 distinct camps, those who love this Aussie rum representation, and those who distinctly dislike it.

Smells like in-fighting

The LOVE IT camp are intoxicated by the intense caramel vanilla nose. The moment you take the top off the bottle the aroma fills the room, and we’ve asked each other with delight, “Oh, what’s that yummy smell!” It’s not unlike the smell of caramel syrup that dodgy coffee shops might add to your latte.

The nose is amplified by the tropicalness of underripe fruit, pineapple and banana. There’s a hint of herbiness, like fresh cut grass.

And a lingering burnt orange brings the nose all together in a neat, delicious aroma of eager anticipation.

The DISLIKE IT camp smell all the unpleasantness of superglue. One Wench smelt it, and said, “I ain’t drinking this.” They detect a grungy acetone, like that nasty Austrian rum Stroh. It smells like a dirty rotten pirate.

Overall, this is what we smelt;

• Rich sweetness; caramel vanilla syrup & golden syrup
• Underripe tropical fruit of banana & pineapple
• Fresh cut grass
• Grungy acetone, just like Stroh
• Dirty rotten pirate

Tastes like a Winter warmer!

The first thing that hits you about the Beenleigh 5 Year Old is the warmth that takes over your palate and gives it a big cuddle. There’s a distinct burn that will perturb new neat rum drinkers, but experienced rum drinkers will feel right at home here. It’s fairly typical of the burn you feel with younger rums.

Distinctly, all drinkers identified a metallic minerality, and in general found it to be unpleasant. Luckily, it falls off the palate quickly.

The flavour left behind is a gorgeous and distinct candied mandarin rind, it’s sweet, citrussy and delicious.

One of our Wenches identified a lingering Calypso mango on the end, with pine wood.

Overall, here’s what we tasted:

• Sweet smooth warm heat
• Metallic minerality
• Candied mandarin rind
• Vanilla & coffee beans
• Calypso mango
• Pine wood

Overall thoughts

3 of us loved it, and 3 of us wouldn’t buy another bottle. It really is a polarising drop to drink neat.

We suspect that this rum would be more pleasing to most as a mixer, but definitely makes an interesting and cheap addition to a home bar.

We think being Australia’s oldest rum producer that Beenleigh has some die-hard fans, and most of those enjoy this rum with Coke.

You can get it everywhere!

Beenleigh 5YO Dark Rum is really easy to find. We have found it in every bottle shop we visited, so distribution looks solid in Australia.

The distillery re-opened last year to allow for visits and tours. We haven’t been, but we’d love to! Here’s a map to the Beenleigh Distillery.

They also make…

A honey liqueur and a white rum. Have you tried these?

Iridium Gold Rum

Made at Mt Uncle Distillery

This rum is close to my heart, literally, as it’s made just a short drive from my ship. I must have been to the distillery at least 10 times! Truth be told, I’m really fond of their pet alpacas, since alpacas are particularly tasty, and the alpacas seem to like my illegal feeding. I’m just fattening them up for Christmas.

Mt Uncle Distillery is run by a very entrepreneurial mob who also produce a top class range of liqueur. I love their banana liqueur, and they even grow bananas at the distillery. The head distiller Mark Watkins appears to be a very passionate and entrepreneurial chap, judging by his updates on Facebook.

They recently took out a gold medal at the Hong Kong International Wine & Spirit Awards for Iridium, which seems somewhat appropriate that they call their rum a ‘gold’ rum.

Iridium is 40% Alc/Vol, and according the label is triple distilled, single barrel aged rum from 100% sugar cane. That makes this rum an agricole style, similar to the French Carribean Rhum Agricole. It’s aged for 4 years in American oak, formerly used for red wine production.

Highlighting this as a small batch distillery, all bottles are hand labelled. Our bottle is #488 from barrel 6.

Iridium Gold Rum tasting notes

We invited 7 tasting wenches, pirates and sailors over to break into this snazzy bottle. The reviews are quite mixed, but in general we felt this was a good rum, and are quite proud of it being made so close to home.

The rum bottle

One of the nicest rum bottles I’ve seen. It’s modern, decorative, and harks back to its origins; the Great Barrier Reef and tropical rainforest. The bottle is clear, and the label is bright aqua blue with and a pleasing golden bronze wrap. The rum colour looks great against the label, and the caramel colour is gorgeously highlighted.

The only disappointing feature of the bottle is perhaps its lid. Although it probably keeps the rum well, I really do love the secure pop sound you get with opening a cork lid.

The bottle is quite impressive to look at, and would make an excellent gift purchase.

Smells nice

In the glass Iridium looks golden and luscious. According to their website the colour is a result of barrel age, and no caramel or additives have been added to this product. It certainly looks yummy!

As soon as we poured this rum the scent wafted around the room. It’s a stinking hot day today, mid-Summer on Australia Day, and fragrances seem to linger a bit longer in the heat.

What we smelled most strongly is a rich salted caramel sauce. We wanted to pour it on ice cream. The caramel was the prominent and very distinguishable fragrance.

When we got our nose deep in the glass, several of us got a whack of alcohol that reminded us of Stroh, the brutal Austrian spirit that we think smells like superglue. There were a few comments like Araldite & acetone, and that 1st whiff close up was a bit challenging.

Upon further inspection and probably after the alcohol has dissipated a bit the nose was much more welcoming. Here’s a shortlist of our comments:

• Mixed spice
• Sweet
• Caramel sauce
• A tropical fuitiness – mostly pineapple and banana
• BBQ caramelised fresh pineapple
• Salty, like a sea breeze.

Do you smell these too? Please comment and tell us what you smelled in your glass of Iridium.

Tastes great, lots of caramel!

In tastings we were a very mixed bunch, with dramatic differences in our palate sophistication and tasting experience.

We all identified an initial heat, “Whoa, it really hits ya!” was the most vibrant expression. I get green peppercorns initially, and the heat falls off the palate quickly, just like green peppercorns do. Many people also reported a minerality, and metallicness in their first sip.

This greenness and minerality is probably due to this rum being from cane spirit instead of molasses. While we haven’t been tasting rums very long we are guessing this from reading other rum reviews of this style.

The mid-palate has a buttery mouthfeel, which many of us found a bit short. We liked the fruit flavours, but were disappointed that the spice on the nose didn’t continue through into the finish.

Here’s what we tasted:

• Sweet golden caramel, not too dark
• Wood & oak
• Overripe apricot
• Mascerated prunes
• Agave nectar sweetness
• Lingering salty sea spray

Overall thoughts

We liked this rum, and would drink again. We find it a pleasant drop, and would likely drink it as an aperitif neat.

It will likely best perform in a cocktail paired with brown sugar, some acid to give it a lift, or some ginger to extend its burn.

Want to taste it too?

Iridium Gold Rum can be purchased online from Mt Uncle Distillery’s website. When we wrote this post it was $80.

Or you could visit Mt Uncle Distillery and drop in for a tasting. Here’s a map to help you find it.

There are others…

FNQ Rum Co also make a white rum; Platinum White Rum. I haven’t had the pleasure in tasting this one yet.

Have you tasted Iridium?

We’d love to know your thoughts too! Please comment below.